(There is no place like Nebraska)
Iowa you’re not even close

follow me i’ll be your host 

Such a beautiful place 

Never go to Iowa. 



Let me take you to the spot where I come from
Let me show you how I’m not just a dumb dumb. 

Let me break you off a piece of the good life. 

The sunset and the stars, pretty good right?


Lincoln baby I see you winking. 

Sayin' come home maybe just for a weekend

Gallup poles said it’s the happiest place

and people axing why I got the happiest face
 


Cuz man I’m Nebraska born 

Corn fed on Nebraska corn 

Iowa Corn? It just don’t cut it boo. 

Shout out to the man, Tom Osbourne say what it do.



(There is no place like Nebraska)

He’s a former football coach

Iowa you’re not even close

Oh it feels so fine. 

We got an airport and there’s never a line.



Props to LPS and UNL

I never get schooled, I was schooled so well.

Humann elementary Pound and Southwest
is where i cut my teeth 
and now I sound best

and if I sound stressed, it’s cuz I haven't been back

to my breath of fresh air, my midnight snack.

And if you don’t know I won’t detonate ya

Listen up, y’all let me educate ya



Our legislature is the only Unicameral 

Take a picture baby fill your camera roll.

Unemployment rate is down to 2.2 percent

A stable local economy cheap housing and rent.


If you think we aren’t progressive then go check the facts

We’re getting better we rock a progressive income tax

We invented arbor day, it’s straight up genius man

and have you seen the Capitol it’s shaped just like a penis? Blam! 





(There is no place like Nebraska)

Dick Cheney not a fun dude.

Dick Cavett much better dude.

Iowa just got sacked. 

There’s more cows than people and that’s a fact



and I gotta give love to my local eats

Omaha steaks with the dopest meats.

Runza, Vals, they oh so prime

But where do I go when it’s taco time?


Shout out to Amigos you’re tacos are the best

Shout out to D’Leons your tacos are second best 

Shout out to Taco Johns your tacos are third best

And I’m sorry Taco Inn, but I just wasn’t impressed.


Warren Buffet sat on a tuffet 

And now he’s a billionaire!

Johnny Carson was Nebraska born
with 
Kool Aid and Fred Astaire 



Man it drives me crazy when people talk smack about my home.

Don’t do it! You haven't been there.

And in an unrelated note. Never go to Iowa.
It smells weird. 
I don’t like it for some reason.
Iowa Sucks !